Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu was only 12 years old when she dedicated her life to mission work. She had heard of the incredible poverty in India and felt called to go and give her life’s work to alleviating the pain and suffering of the Indian people. In 1946, she took another brave step. She moved out of the community of missionaries with which she had been living and moved into the slums to live among the people she served. Four years later, she officially became an Indian citizen. She said many years later, “God died for you and for me and for that leper and for that person dying of hunger and for that person on the street… It’s not enough to say you love God. You also have to say you love your neighbor. Be the good news to your home people first. Find out about your next-door neighbor.”
Agnes Bojaxhiu was better known as Mother Teresa and is probably an extreme example of the Caregiving Sacred Pathway we’ll be talking about today. These Christians serve God by serving others. They often claim to see Christ in the poor and needy. Some call them codependent – and they might - in some instances - fit that psychological description – but their faith is built up by interacting with other people.
Caregivers may find it very hard to receive from others. They may see introspection as selfish and can be heard criticizing the contemplative or ascetic pathway. Whereas caring for others can wear many of us down, this recharges a caregiver’s batteries.
We’re continuing this exploration of the ways different people relate to God. We’ve talked about: (and have them identify the path that seems to be dominate)
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the Naturalist, who responds to the glory of God’s handiwork,
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the Sensate, who delights in incorporating all the senses to experience God
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the Traditionalist, who is moved by symbol, ritual, and liturgy
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the Ascetic, who seeks solitude and simplicity
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the Activist, who is motivated by putting faith into action, and
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the Contemplative, who desires a deepening emotional and spiritual intimacy with God
Jesus displayed, at one time of another, all the various spiritual temperaments. Most of us lack the depth and breadth revealed in Jesus’ life to have every path. Having said this, however, it is no secret that one of Jesus’ dominant pathways to God was caregiving. He cared for the sick, the demon-possessed, and the lost. He urged His followers to give to the poor, and He had great compassion for the needs of the multitudes.
One picture in particular reveals the caregiving heart of Jesus. When He heard that John the Baptist had been beheaded, Jesus knew His earthly ministry had taken a serious turn. Jesus needed some time to pray and process all that was happening. He undoubtedly knew that his own death was imminent and wanted to make certain that his group of disciples could be trusted to carry on the message of love once He was gone. If ever a man deserved solitude, it was Jesus. If ever there was a time to set legitimate limits, this was it.
But when Herod’s birthday came, the daughter of Herodias danced before the company, and she pleased Herod so much that he promised on oath to grant her whatever she might ask. Prompted by her mother, she said, “Give me the head of John the Baptist here on a platter.” The king was grieved, yet out of regard for his oaths and for the guests, he commanded it to be given; he sent and had John beheaded in the prison. His head was brought on a platter and given to the girl, who brought it to her mother. His disciples came and took the body and buried him; then they went and told Jesus.
Feeding the Five Thousand
Now when Jesus heard this, he withdrew from there in a boat to a deserted place by himself. But when the crowds heard it, they followed him on foot from the towns. When he went ashore, he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion for them and cured their sick. When it was evening, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a deserted place, and the hour is now late; send the crowds away so that they may go into the villages and buy food for themselves.” Jesus said to them, “They need not go away; you give them something to eat.” They replied, “We have nothing here but five loaves and two fish.” And he said, “Bring them here to me.” Then he ordered the crowds to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish, he looked up to heaven and blessed and broke the loaves and gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the crowds. And all ate and were filled, and they took up what was left over of the broken pieces, twelve baskets full. And those who ate were about five thousand men, besides women and children.
Jesus Walks on the Water
Immediately he made the disciples get into a boat and go on ahead to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but by this time the boat, battered by the waves, was far from the land,[b] for the wind was against them. And early in the morning he came walking toward them on the sea. But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, saying, “It is a ghost!” And they cried out in fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, “Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid.”
Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat, started walking on the water, and came toward Jesus. But when he noticed the strong wind,[c] he became frightened, and, beginning to sink, he cried out, “Lord, save me!” Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” When they got into the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”
The Message translation says:
When Jesus saw the crowds, “He was moved with compassion for them, and healed their sick.” The Message translation has Jesus say, “This crowd is breaking my heart.”
Matt. 14: 6-21
Jesus put His own needs under the needs of others. His example challenges us today. It is so easy to ignore the needs of others around us because we have other important things to do, but Jesus defined those very needs as a central part of our mission.
The Bible gives us countless examples about how to love God by caring for others. Remember the story of the Good Samaritan? Paul urged the early Christians to look after each other: “ Let each of you look out not only for your own interest, but also the interests of others.” The writer of Hebrews equates loving others with loving God and then reminds us that in giving care to strangers, we may be entertaining angels.
The definition of caregiving many take on a variety of ways to serve others:
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helping a friend through a personal crisis
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lending money, without assurance that it will be paid back
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helping someone out of an addiction
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volunteering on a rescue squad
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helping an illiterate person to read
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donating time at a shelter
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working in a soup kitchen
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fixing someone’s car
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repairing things around the church or at someone’s house
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making recordings for the blind
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researching a cure for a disease
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helping someone reconfigure their computer system
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watching the child of some tired parents
This kind of caring isn’t done for oneself, for financial compensation, or for attention. It is done out of a sense that because God loves, we share the love we have received with others.
Like any other spiritual pathway, the Caregiver faces some potential drawbacks. First, a caregiver cannot judge others and their spiritual expressions. It is true that all Christians are called to care for others, but there are different ways to do it, and it is not for us to judge the validity of someone else’s worship.
Another potential temptation is to serve ourselves through serving others. Some people with low self-esteem may feel the need to serve others to validate their own existence. This is the road to codependency. Caregiving as a spiritual expression means we express our love to God by reaching out to others – it’s the picture of a heart overflowing with love and spilling out onto those around us.
A Los Angeles minister gained national attention as the “minister of dollar handshakes”. His idea of helping the poor was to cruise Skid Row every Sunday afternoon and pass out dollar bills to the homeless. One social worker wryly observed that this stroll “does nothing for the people but does a lot for Father Chase.”
The final potential drawback is the temptation to neglect the ones closest to the caregiver. We probably all know people who give and give to the community and the needy but do so at the expense to the ones with whom they live. In our zeal to love God by loving others, we must remember that God makes home a priority. If we are truly loving God, and not just serving to satisfy our own needs, we will be content to care for those at home first. Caring for one’s own marriage or children is a major part of what it means to worship God.
Caregiving is a high and holy calling. It isn’t as visible a preaching to the crowds, but it is a powerful way to honor God. How many of you think your spiritual path might be one of a caregiver?
Joan Hollister Gilbert was a delightful person who had a long, difficult, and courageous battle against cancer. At a time when she had only a few days left to her life, she invited two women to come and sit by her bedside. She said she knew she was going to die, and she talked about it. She said she wasn’t afraid and was excited about entering into God’s presence.
But that was the shortest part of the conversation. Most of the time she talked about people for whom she was concerned. The ones most on her mind were children – the women’s children, her own children, children she knew, and children in general.
In the last days of her life, Joan invited a whole list of people to come to her bedside so that she could bless them before she died. Those who could not come, she talked with on the telephone.
If anyone ever had a right to be self-concerned, and if ever there was a time when she had every justification to be primarily focused upon herself, it was Joan and it was then. But she lived a life of compassion. She cared more about others and their needs than she cared about herself and her own needs. That’s the way of caregiving.