Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be pregnant from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to divorce her quietly. But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet:
“Look, the virgin shall become pregnant and give birth to a son,
and they shall name him Emmanuel,”
which means, “God is with us.” When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife but had no marital relations with her until she had given birth to a son, and he named him Jesus.
Matt. 1: 18-25
When we hear this story, we often put our 21st century focus on Mary, who finds herself in a pregnant predicament. However, Jews in the 1st century audience would have known that it really was Joseph who was in trouble. Because they were betrothed, Joseph was already regarded as Mary’s husband. The law required a one-year waiting period before the couple could consummate their marriage. It was during this waiting period that Mary learned that she was expecting. The young couple knew that everyone would assume Mary had committed adultery or that she and Joseph had been together before it was allowed.
Under these circumstances, Joseph had two choices. He could divorce her or he could consummate the marriage, and admit that he had broken the law. The text tells us that Joseph was a righteous and considerate man. He saw no choice but to divorce Mary, but he wanted to do that privately so she was not publicly humiliated. Had he followed through with this plan, no one would have blamed him. After the angel told Joseph in a dream that the child was divine and that Joseph’s role as father was needed, Joseph took Mary as his wife.
This is substantive: by keeping Mary as his wife, Joseph claimed public responsibility for her and the child. Most importantly, by naming the child, Joseph acknowledged Jesus as his own son and gave him an ancestry. Without Joseph, Jesus would have been an illegitimate child in a world hostile toward children, especially children without male parentage.
Think with me for a moment about the birth stories in the Gospels of Matthew and Luke.
Who are the main characters?
Who speaks?
Sometimes the quietest person in the story is the one who has a large impact. Consider that Joseph has many roles in this story, yet he does not have a speaking role. He is often relegated to the back of the nativity without any presence at all. Yet, he is the one who literally “saves” Mary from embarrassment, and possibly stoning. He is the one who gives Jesus legitimacy and a heritage. And he is the one who offers Mary and Jesus safety. But he does not say a word.
The Gospel of Mathew begins with an ancestry for Jesus. It is an ancestry from Joseph’s family, not Mary’s. Without Joseph’s lineage, Jesus would not have fulfilled the heritage prescribed in the Bible for the coming Messiah.
Where the Gospel of Luke focuses on the girl from Galilee, the Gospel of Matthew focuses on Joseph. It shows Joseph to be a just man in an unjust empire. In this first story of Joseph, we get a glimpse into Joseph’s character: he valued Mary as a person, far beyond what sum of money he could demand in a divorce settlement from her family. Joseph decides to accept the baby as his own, give Mary his vow, and offer legitimacy to the both of them.
As we think about this new baby Jesus born into the world in Bethlehem and shaped by this landscape, this economy, and this political environment with Herod demanding the babies under two years old being destroyed, how does this inform our imaginations about who Jesus would become as a person? Did Jesus suffer from malnourishment like many other neighborhood children? Did he overhear conversations riddled with fears of losing homes or jobs? Where his uncles detained by soldiers – Roman or Herodian? Did his dark skin, Galilean accent, and Jewish mannerisms make him a target for ridicule or incessant suspicion by the elites?
When Mary and Joseph took toddler Jesus to Egypt as an immigrant family, imagine the tough choices his parents had to make to travel there as a family with a small child.
Joseph was a man who knew what sacrificial love was. He know that it might demand that he give up power, status, and economic security for the sake of another. He was willing to do that so that another person – Mary – could be protected. Later, he was willing to do that so that another person – Jesus – could be protected. He lowered himself voluntarily for the sake of Mary, whose life and well-being were in danger. Joseph is the example of love in the nativity story. Have you known a person like Joseph? A person who said little, but through his/her actions was willing to take the weight of responsibility onto his/her shoulders to ease the burden of another? A person with strength and love who offered self in order to protect and save another? “There is no greater love than this – to lay down one’s life for another.”
Joseph’s role in making difficult decision about where to go, when to leave, how to stay safe, is indicative of love in an unstable world. God supported Joseph in these decisions through dreams. God was “with him” in all of it. And Joseph listened deeply to God’s still small voice and knew that he was not alone.
As we listen again and again to the holy story this season, let us listen to the unspoken words of this remarkable man, Joseph, who does not speak, but who made the difference in so many lives that first Advent. He demonstrated unconditional love in an unstable world. Let us speak less and love more as we celebrate this season!